Wednesday, October 1, 2008

A mixture of things...

As in a mixture of emotions. 1 thing. This morning at 4 am, I was able to witness something so miraculous. So that was a very very beautiful thing. 2nd thing. Today I feel like such an ass. It's a combination of things. People I've crossed. A misconstrued truth that I have recognized. Maybe it's all in my imagination and I just need to put my ego aside. (?) I'm hurt, to say the least. I'm only human, and I want to make things right and I wish this was all drawn out on a map for me, but obviously there is something missing.

I don't say or claim that I'm a certain type of person. I'd like to believe I'm a good person with many many many many many many many flaws. Or could it be I'm a bad person, trying to do good? I can never say. I'd like to believe that we are all good people with many flaws. I dunno, it's a life quest if you ask me. But today I feel like an ass... and today, someone helped me recognize that.

After Saturday, I will be able to start focusing on other things. This has taken so much out of me and like I said, I hope in the end I can look back and say, "I helped make it happen." I know one thing is for sure: I'm not doing this next year. Take my name and my face off this thing, I don't care. I know at the end of the day this is all community based and driven so haters can hate on all they want... don't you know??? I love it when they hate. (Haha, well not really. That's me being an ass again). THANK YOU.

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